Rulah: Ugh. What is that? It smells like someone stretched out horseskin and forgot to make leather.

Gahncai: That’s me. It’s something dogesires can do.

Rulah: Gross.

Gahncai: That monster was choking us! The bet says we can’t raise our moxes, so…

Ularon: It was choking you two. I breathe though the water in my robes.

Bria: I’m undead. I don’t breathe.

Rulah: And let me guess-

Gahncai: I have the lung capacity of a hippo.

Rulah: Obviously.

Y’know, when I say an episode is boring, I don’t mean “it’s so boring, I’d edit it and then totally forget to post it,” but that’s what happened.

I’d apologize for our weird digression into class structure but honestly, what else is happening in this episode? What’s your favorite class, listener? The humble proletariat? The reactionary bourgeoisie? The redoubtable bürger?

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Sunday nights at 12:00 PM ET / 11:00 PM CT.

We compare Riker vacations to Picard vacations, gush about Vash, and also there some time travel there…just because?

Vash seems like such an outside-of-the box perfect fit for Picard. I’d be curious about other such fits for members of the crew. I would not put K’Ehylar in that place for Worf. They have dynamite chemistry, but she borders on whatever a Klingon version of a manic pixie dream girl is. I’d be interested in seeing the “Vash” for the rest of the crew.

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Sunday nights at 12:00 PM ET / 11:00 PM CT.

People talk about Patrick Stewart coming back to Star Trek. They don’t want a send-off for Captain Picard (We had one of those and it was called “All Good Things…” They want more TNG, just TNG for a million years. www.TNG.com.

That’s not going to happen and if we ever—god forbid—see the TNG cast together in some kind of production, it should be a really real super sendoff. My initial impulse for that was something grimdark; ‘Fall of The Federation’ or some bullshit like that. Everything breaks. The universe is reset. Everybody dies.

Because of course everybody dies. But that’s not want people want from TNG either. They want the people they like to be happy and to grow and change. The grimdark story is a lot easier to pitch, but it seems fair to start with the happy ending rundown and then say “but that’s not interesting” and do the stupid, grimdark lazy story.

So what’s that happy ending look like?

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Allegiance

This one’s got Libertarian jokes and pacifist jokes in it because we are both fair and balanced and neither Libertarians nor pacifists. “Allegiance” isn’t bad; it just fails to be inspiring and is another in a long line of episodes that are about Picard, but don’t need to be.

I also have to apologize because it was only during editing that I realized I missed a long line of “you might be a Libertarian if…” jokes. I’m sure we’ll get to them.

Finally, I want to introduce everyone to my son, Applied Research VanVelding, and my daughter, Doctoral Thesis VanVelding. They’re great kids and my hopes for them in the future are modest. Really, naming your kid ‘fighter’ in a martial society works, but it would be hilarious to see a more modern/post-modern culture do it. Maybe the diversification of labor keeps us from doing it, but we could still go for D&D classes, right?

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Sunday nights at 12:00 PM ET / 11:00 PM CT.

A Lair Somewhere #06

Bria: My hand’s here Rulah. Ghancai, lift the door, would you?

Rulah: Thanks Bria. Are you three okay?

Bria: Better than we look.

Rulah: YOU look like death warmed over.

Bria: Well, we’re doing WAY better than *I* look.