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All posts by VanVelding

I would love to visit spreadsheet planet. It would accomplish more than this episode.

In this episode, I forgot what the name of this website is. Is it Kris.com? It’s not. I also mixed up “The Omen,” “Rosemary’s Baby,” and “Eraserhead.” But I did not mix up how much I love potatoes though.

Also, shout-out to listener and commenter Skiltao who pitched the idea of a “Skin of Evil”/”Conspiracy”/”The Child” three-parter which would have given us the kind of through-line and body horror that would’ve done some of these episodes some justice.

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Monday mornings at 2:00 AM ET / 1:00 CT.

Every Thursday, I make a brief development blog on my card/board game, Dead Parents Dungeon (DPD). It’s a fantasy-themed, light-hearted game about families and dungeons.

Current Progress: Rebooting

What is best in life? To see your family grow proud before you. To hear the lamentations of monsters. To retire responsibly to that little castle on the beach you always talked about.

Dead Parents Dungeon is a game where players take on the role of adventuring families who seek the money and fame which can only be found by defeating dangerous monsters in the many frightening dungeons of the world. Players manage marriages, children, and heirlooms between the life-threatening forays into the world’s darkest corners. The first player to put aside enough monster heads to earn a total of 10 retirement points has the most successful family and is the winner!

The new take on Dead Parents Dungeon keeps the dice. It keeps gear (now Heirlooms). It keeps Adventurers and Monsters, but dispenses with the class leveling and minion mechanics. It gets rid of the scars and silver currency and converts monsters directly into monster heads.

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Updates: I still love Community; I still hate Scrubs.

Things to hope for in Season 2: Better use of Troi, more dimensions to Geordi, A Very Vagra II Christmas, Wesley’s Richard Stabone.

Bonus Lesson: Growing Pain’s Boner was actually played by Andrew Koenig, son of Walter Koenig.

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Monday mornings at 2:00 AM ET / 1:00 CT.

I will apologize for post-production delaying this one for so long. I will NOT apologize for the singing.

Regarding the heating in space. Apparently, black-body radiation can allow a medium to radiate heat from a space station into space. It’s a system used on–duh–the International Space Station; the real space station that’s in orbit right now and not boiling from waste heat. I am an idiot.

We glossed over the series’ better tries at being feminist by pretending not to know what a ‘homemaker’ is. It’s not that gender equality eliminates homemaking or that an ideal future has everyone in the workforce and no one engaged in childcare full-time (what even is the difference between working at a day care and being a stay-at-home parent in a society with no currency), it’s that homemaking as a female-dominated “occupation” which generates no income creates a societal power imbalance in capitalist societies.

I’m a bit disappointed we didn’t keep Romulan co-captains or that we never heard from these guys afterwards. Except for the books where Offenhouse is literally better at diplomacy and commerce than anyone else in The Federation (jesus beeping christ).

The Beige and The Bold is available on iTunes, Stitcher, and other podcasting platforms. It updates Monday mornings at 2:00 AM ET / 1:00 CT.

Last week I talked about 9/11(film) a real name of a real movie about 9/11 (event) which was released (around? in? caddy-who-give-a-shit?) Comic-Con. Here’s many other things:

I never saw Kingsmen. It seems cool. I’d watch this (except I won’t).

Stranger Things is objectively great (no, I haven’t seen it). The most remarkable thing about this is that they don’t play “Thriller” at the end despite my rising anticipation, which means I’ve somehow been cockblocked by the absence of Michael Jackson.

As you may or may not remember, my biggest complaint with Discovery was that it treats, ‘we have to fire first’ as a patch that fixes something that isn’t wrong with Star Trek in the first place. This trailer restores a little bit of my faith.

Also, Harry Mudd is a psychopath played by Dwight from The Office (US). I’m surprisingly ambivalent about this.

I feel stupid for thinking that Preacher (TV series) couldn’t be as crazy as “Preacher” (comic).

I’m…not gonna watch this. It doesn’t–the tone and visuals do not match and it looks like hot garbage. You’ve done a lot of work loosening us up over the last eight years, Marvel Studios, but you just can’t plunge this into us dry. Where’s the lube-extruding inhuman, Inhumans?

It’s like if Alien Nation had a baby with Shadowrun. Why does this get a pass and Inhumans doesn’t? Fuck me if I know. Or, actually, you can just fuck me in any case, Bright. Lemme know what time is good for you.

Have you tried fucking all the way off and back on again?

I sometimes forget why I don’t watch this show. Then I remember (1) basic cable (2) not Rick and Morty.

Rick and Morty returns July 30.

 

…what do you mean, “Queued for August 1”?

Every Thursday, I make a brief development blog on my card/board game, Dead Parents Dungeon (DPD). It’s a fantasy-themed, light-hearted game about families and dungeons.

Current Progress: meh

I cook. I don’t make food for humans. I make piles of tasteless nutrients which only I can bear to eat (I’m affectionately called ‘The Jade Goat’ from time to time). By the end of the pile, even I have a hard time stomaching it.

I hate repeating work, and rejiggering everything in DPD is repeated work. I can barely stomach it.

Everything someone makes to present to other people has to reach a balance between “personally satisfying” and “appealing to an audience.” The part where DPD is appealing to an audience–simple, straightforward, fast–is sapping me of the personally satisfying elements that got me to do it in the first place. It’s where I usually stumble on projects.

English is an exceptional language in that it captures all of this in the phrase, “hard work.” It won’t be impressive progress for a while, but it’ll be progress.